How you raise your kid is really no one else's business. But that doesn't mean we're not watching and judging your parenting choices. Parents and non-parents alike can't help but have opinions about the things on this list. Just remember, it's all in good fun (and that you've probably judged other parents for at least a few of these in your lifetime as well).
- "We're not having any fun over here either"
- Is it possible to raise your kids without raising your voice?
- Embrace the Chaos: Worst judgment for moms comes from within
- Bringing baby to a spa: OK or no way?
- Embrace the Chaos: Yes, I'm a judgy mommy
Wow... just because you preface an article with it being all in fun doesn't make it so. It sounds like "I hate to be rude but..."
I do agree that out of control children have no place at expensive fine restaurants and as a person, regardless of age; it is rude to not consider other people around you. On the other hand, if you don't want to see children while you're eating, don't go to family restaurants.
What my children wear is a reflection on me. Good, because I'm proud that I have a 5yr old boy who likes bright red knee socks, red crocs, red shorts and red shirts, all at once. Oh wait, should I censor my child because some random adult with nothing better to do has decided to judge a 5yr old? Sorry, one of the things you learn when you're a parent is that what other people think really doesn't matter. It's very liberating.
Did it ever occur to the author that with their attitude, others might just being using their child’s schedule as an excuse not to have to see their self-righteous, childless friend? - Just saying…
here you say you don’t want our kids to misbehave but you don’t want us to discipline them ether, you know the biggest problem with children today is there is no discipline, parents are afraid to discipline their children for fear of losing their children and yes I realize there is a fine line between discipline and abuse however I got my fare share of smack’s on the bottom and I grew up fine, any time outs I got or lost privileges I never took seriously.
Germs ...really come on I know loads of adults who are way more disgusting then my 2 1/2 year old could ever be.
Security Items, really who cares, my daughter has for the most part left her KIKI in the truck however not because I care what some dough brain might think but because of fear of losing the silly thing, and didn’t you realize the reason they look so worn out is because they get thrown in the wash every chance we get and I don’t know any child that ever had a soother long enough to get yucky looking those bad boys get replaced often.
Have you ever heard of picking your battles if the child is dressing themselves then that’s that?
Children out to late that really depends on the circumstance, I don’t know about casino’s since where I live you can’t bring children into a casino you have to be 19yrs or older and why would you want to, so Irticle on children can’t comment on that , but not all people should be parents ect ect...nuff said
Crazy schedule are a part of everyone’s lives regardless of wither they have kids or not
As for the whole leash thing you know what they say “better to be paranoid then dead”
Breast feeding to long ....O give me a break that’s the same people who aren’t comfortable with someone breastfeeding period, I personally don’t like breastfeeding past a year and a half but that’s me , to each their own. I really dislike these types of people they make it really hard on new moms starting out and trying to breast feed ...these women are uncomfortable enough...leave them alone for goodness sake.
In the end even the best behaved children will throw you a curve ball every once in a while, nobody is saying parenting is easy and nobody is complaining about being a parent, however people who have never had a child of their own really can’t relate, cause sometimes **** just happens, that’s the joy of being a parent, it’s never boring and always interesting, most challenging job I’ve ever had and the most rewarding too
I would like to present to you a list of how the author should act in public, I would appreciate your comments on this!
1) Don't talk on your cell phone in a restaurant or plane, it is far more irritating and and will usually last MUCH longer than a tantrum
2) NEVER eat anything but the healthiest foods (we ARE judging you!!)
3) If strollers aren't allowed on the sidewalk because they take up too much room, than you CAN'T walk side by side with a friend OR walk right in the middle when you are on your own (I know you do it, we all do)
4) No fights or arguments with friends or spouses in public or anywhere when someone can hear you. this includes when your windows are open, and when you are talking on your phone (see point #1)
5) Never go to work when you are sick, that small office can pass germs much faster than the open spaces of a mall. Also, just to be safe never go outside when sick, or even leave your room.
6) Never dress in anything but your BEST clothing when you go out in public, even in your back yard! You never Know who is judging you!
7) Don't go out past a reasonable hour, even on weekends people might get the wrong impression of you. and you need your sleep.
8) Don't stick to an exact schedule such as going to work on time or to a doctor's appointment, remember, teaching a child about routine will never help them in the real world!!!
Children are people, not animals. Some of these points might make a bit of sense in a different context but if parents followed your rules their children would just stay at home eating salads and playing video games without the benefits of social interaction.
1) Not take our kids to nice restaurants, but make sure to not let you see us feeding them the food that is available at lower price point joints.
2) Stay fit, but not have kids in strollers or meet up with other mothers to keep that up.
3) Not travel with kids, or DRUG them if you do? Just so that the other passengers aren't inconvenienced? How about YOU take a private jet?
4) Make sure we teach our children to not show emotion, and make sure to chastize them for not being developmentally capable of controlling themselves yet....and don't buy groceries unless you can afford childcare in case you should run across the judgy types.
5) Although you will be mostly at home to prevent bothering others, make sure that when you've had no sleep you never lose patience...oh and wear some lipstick too.
6) Although no one else has to quarantine themselves when they're sick, make sure you do it with your kids. No matter if you have other children and have life necessities to take care of.
7) Make sure your kid doesn't tantrum, but make sure you also don't let them have any comfort items that aren't a Burberry bag or gucci that might actually keep them from throwing a tantrum.
8) See above, make sure your children are well accessorized. After all, they're just little dolls aren't they?
9) Don't go out with your kids during the day, don't go out with them at night. Get a personal assistant to help you with your shopping because the world should be as sanitized and adult as possible.
10) Your kids may need you, they may have needs, but isn't it ok to just ignore those for your self-centred indulgent friends that hate your kids anyway?
11) Control your kid with your mind, do not try to restrain them in any way. But make sure they're well-behaved or we'll judge you!
12) World Health Organization? What's that? Who cares if they recommend breastfeeding until the age of two and beyond (well beyond being able to ask for a snack)....
13) And lastly, don't have kids. Buy a chihuahua and a nice expensive purse to carry him in...who needs people anyway? Oh, and isn't that money and time better spent texting and on your Iphone?
Guess waking up every morning with my beautiful family, with real kids who sometimes misbehave and breastfed until at least 2 1/2 but know enough not to judge people or say nasty things about them, is just annoying.
This was probably written by people from an older generation (like me) who are tired of parents of today either pandering to their kids' every whim or who have no business being parents at all. I've seen kids at high end restaurants misbehaving and parents parading their 1 month old infant in the middle of July with no sun protection and in January with no socks on their feet or hats on their heads. This generation of parents needs to stop accusing everyone of being selfish and start using some comment sense when it comes to raising children.
Ok all you spazzy oversensitive parents take a breather! Maybe you have forgotten that having children is a CHOICE and that everyone else should not have to put up with your misbehaving, screaming, dirty, stinky little brat. I know its hard to believe that not everyone finds little baby junior son of a b.itch as adorable and angelic as you do.
And please stop acting like popping out a kid is some magical thing that makes you so freakin special. Most anyone can have a child, it takes work to be a parent though.
Keep your kids under control, teach them some manners and use some common sense and there wouldnt be articles like this written for you to throw tantrums over. Get a grip.
I think some people did not read number one where it said this was all in Good fun however what irked me was the those who are childless comments and a few of those who have children but are trying to be all my kids were and are well behaved all the time ....like come on who are you kidding.....Ok I was once childless too, as we all were and I too use to think get that crying baby out of here!, can't you stop that kid from screaming. But now I have kids and I can honestly say that sometimes baby's cry and kids throw tantrums. It's easy to say “make that child stop doing whatever behaviour you or someone doesn’t like” however it's really unrealistic after all children aren’t little robots they don't have off switches or mute button's” wouldn’t that be something if they did”. As for this list well here’s my two cents
Kids in Nice restaurants..... If it's a really fancy restaurant ...well I have never seen a child in a really fancy restaurant .And if you’re talking about a family restaurant well it's a "family restaurant" thus children are present.
What I feed my child is no one’s business but mine and what we eat when we go out is by no means what we eat at home, were out just like you and eating something we normally wouldn’t have at home for dinner.
Strollers really you can’t come up with anything better than that?
Children on planes , not all children travel badly ...people always comment on how good my kids are , “ they didn’t even realize that they were there”, however for those moments that are out of a parents control like change in pressure , which bothers some more then other’s . You really think parents enjoy listening to their child scream and cry...it bothers us probably more then you, some things you just got to grin and bare.
I don’t stand there and look embarrassed I continue shopping It’s really easy for someone to say you should leave however I'm what you call a work widow(for those of you who don't understand that means my husband is away working all the time so I basically raise the kids and do everything by myself) This means yes I have to take the kids to the grocery store "the horror" LOL and I don't have the luxury to leave the store or where ever I am if my children aren’t behaving . I'm there for a purpose and since I'm a stay at home mom getting a sitter in would be kind of silly also I live 1 hour and 20min from town so when I go it's an all day trip. I can't just zip in and be back in 30 min I don't know anyone who would stay that long to watch the kids other than day care and it’s not easy to get your kids into daycare , that's if I even felt comfortable with leaving my kids with somebody. I don’t like it any better than you do however my children, my husband and myself need to eat , among other things so suck it up butter cup. continued
I'd like to see how saying this to someone with children out load to their face would go over. It wouldn't cause criticizing ppl is not nice. thus think what you want but keep it to yourself cause we all have "we could do it better things when it comes to ppls kids" even friends........ but you know what...........they aren't your children so you do yours and i'll do mine.
Wow, did the people who wrote this have kids?! I agree with some of it, such as the bad food choices...but WOW if a child feels comfortable with an old teddy bear, is it REALLY worth judgement on the parents?! I think what would be worth judgement is the parent who won't allow a child to bring a comfort object, since generally as parents we are dragging our kids along to somewhere they don't want to be. It's only fair to make sure they are happy too.
What a ridiculous article. No one has the right to JUDGE anyone, for any reasons. Let alone the assinine points listed here.
Pg 8 Germy kids - Um, teaching anyone takes time, and learning takes time, nobody should be confined to their house until they have learned everything, after all, you seem to forget that the sidewalk is a shared space. How rude of you, stay home and stop infecting everyone else with your rudeness, I'm trying to teach my children to be polite, and your attitude is not helping.
Pg 9 security blankets - It's a big world out there, and when you're that young it's a big scary world, having something that makes you feel safe sometimes helps. Besides, teaching a child that young to take care of something they care about, and having it for years also teaches them responsibility. How do you think your parents taught you that if you don't take care of your things you will lose or break them... Step 1 - find something the child really likes... Step 2 - teach them to take care of it.
Pg 10 Clothing choices - At some point in time, a parent has to let the child learn how to dress themselves. I for one will not be the type of parent that still has to dress my 20 year old toddler... you might be, but I won't. So yes, it's a reflection on me, a parent that is teaching my child to be independent... how is that a bad thing?
Pg 11 Kids out late - Really this depends on the conditions. A single parent, working 2 jobs might not have any choice but to go grocery shopping at 11 pm with their children... well it's either that, or there's no food in the house... what's worse, having the child out late, or starving the child? Sometimes, there is no choice, a parent does what they have to... On the other hand, out all night at the casino is another matter all together.... but hey, at least they didn't abandon the child so they could go to the casino... Not that I approve of the casino choice, but it could be worse.
Pg 12 Crazy schedules - What can I say, some parents are more crazy then others about the schedule their child is on. I have to ask however, what bothers you more, the childs crazy schedule, or that the parent (your friend) cares more about their child then they do about you? Next question, what are you a child? No? then stop acting like one... In other words, the point you're trying to make here is childish.
Pg 13 Leashes - Young children can disappear in less then 5 seconds, some parents have experienced this... very often at a mall... when the child does this and thinks it's funny, you (as the parent) have to teach the child that it is not acceptable, and if that means using a leash, so be it. What's worse, putting a leash on the child after they've taken off a few times, or not putting a leash on the child and letting them continue to take off until eventually the time comes that you can't find them?? Sometimes parents have to choose the lesser of two evils and don't for one second think that parents enjoy making that choice.
Pg 14 Breast feeding - In this case I actually agree completely, however that's my personal opinion/belief. There is a lot of scientific proof that this practice is healthy for the child.. and there is proof that it's not a good practice... so really, this point is a personal choice. What's a parent to do... make the choice that suits your personal beliefs... to circumcise or not to circumcise... should the child be raised catholic, or protestant, or.... When to stop breast feeding... Sometimes a parent just makes the choice based on their own personal beliefs... And what gives you the right to insult anyone's personal belief?... Actually I thought the right to practice personal belief was protected by the law?.. providing it doesn't effect any one else's rights that is, and does this practice somehow restrict your rights? No? Then shut up and have some respect for other people and their beliefs.
Here's what I think.
Pg 2, nice restaurants- I agree fancy restaurants and kids don't mix, family restaurants however are exactly that FAMILY, and that includes the children. Don't like it, then don't go to a FAMILY restaurant.
Pg 3 Food choices - some children simply won't eat a salad, so what would be the point of only feeding them something they will not eat, so that the parents can throw it in the garbage? Then what, the kids will fill up on junk food when you're in the bathroom because they're still hungry... On the other hand the child should not be eating hotdogs and fries every day... personally I let them have that crap food for a meal 1 to 2 times a week, and healthy foods every other day... the healthy foods are however things the children will actually eat... roast beef, spaghetti, stir fry, etc.
Pg 4 Massive strollers- Hate to tell you, but everyone is allowed to use the side walk, that includes parents with strollers... how else do we get our children to various places like the local park... drive? ya, that's great for the environment, and teaches our children to be lazy. Sorry, but you have no valid point here.
Pg 5 Kids on planes - umm, what is your point? want a better seat? pay for first class. Everyone is entitled to travel, not just the childless... and umm, the seat the kid is in cost just as much as the seat you are in.
Pg 6 Public Tantrums - You have a lot to learn about children... first of all a public tantrum is the childs attempt at forcing the parent to give them what they want, if the parent gives in, in any way (that includes leaving the store) the child learns that they can force the parent to either give them what they want, or the parent will not get what they want, like the groceries... no, let the child have the tantrum, and rather then talking behind the parents back that's dealing with it, walk over and say something along the lines of 'you know when my child does that, they lose something, last time they last their game boy'.. say it so the child hears, this teaches the child that nobody in the store is going to help them, and it makes the parent more comfortable to deal with the situation PROPERLY. The only time I would judge a parent is when they 'give in' to the child to make them stop the tantrum.
Pg 7 Public discipline - Actually public discipline of a child is very important, it teaches them that they can't get away with something just because you're not at home. The parent that is willing to scream and give a little spank or a time out to a child in public is the same parent that will NOT do anything worse when they are at home, I worry more about the parent that doesn't discipline in public, because seriously, what do they do in private that they are not willing to do in public?? Think about it, then think of all the times you've heard the statement 'I never would of thought 'John (or Jane) Doe' would do that, (s)he always seemed so gentle, I've never even heard him/her raise his/her voice'
To be con't
I can't believe any parent would find this article "pretty good for the most part". It's complete rubbish. And let me say that the last thing I'll concern myself with while out with my children, is whether or not I'm being judged by these fools. Judge away pal, it's probably all you're any good at anyway!
OMG!!! MSN are you for real?!?! This by far one of the most IGNORANT, HORRIBLY written, DISGRACEFUL articles!!!! And the whole caffeine stunting growth?! OMG are you serious? I give my kids sips of coffee to let them get a taste of it just b/c they have little sips here and there DOESN'T mean they're going to stop growing!!!! As for the rest of things we as parents get judged on, SHAME ON THOSE WHO DO JUDGE, because YOU WERE ALSO THAT CRYING KID ON THE FLOOR ONCE, YOU WERE THE ONE WHO WANTED TO WEAR THAT COSTUME TO THE STORE ONCE!!!!..like really GROW UP!!!!!
What the hell do you childless ppl expect of us mothers who sit at home with our kids ALL day EVERYDAY to do?!? Not go ut at all?! Like GEEZ, you don't think we as mothers are tired of the tantrums, and maybe JUST MAYBE our kids are wearing a mismatching outfit(oh no) to AVOID a tantrum?, i don't about you but i'd rather put a "leash" on my child ANY day if it means my child is going to be SAFE, yeah dumb thing eh? something like keeping our kids safe!! And if MY child decide she wants to wear a helmet so be it(and for the parents out there who's kids HAVE to wear them for medical reasons all the power to you) Alot of the things listed here for things we're being judged on is pathetic. So what if my child's eating a hot dog, bet you didn't notice the FRESH FRUIT she ate for dessert, did you?
This article was a complete waste of time of my evening the ONLY time i get to eat a hot meal, or just sit for 5 minutes.....UNBELIVABLE that MSN would even allow this as an article!!! SHAME ON MSN!!!!