Redbook
Updated: January 8, 2013 4:30 PM
4 Signs Your Marriage Needs Work

You learn to spot them when you run a couples retreat called "The Marriage Checkup." But program director James V. Cordova, Ph.D., promises that if you catch the bad marriage signs early, patients can make a full recovery. You know you've got relationship work to do if you notice...



The money fights are fierce (© Getty Images)
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The money fights are fierce
"Most people think these arguments are just about spending and saving, but they're really about our emotional relationships with money," Cordova says. "I once worked with a couple who were both passionate collectors of tropical fish. He would buy them and sneak them into the tank even though she thought they didn't need any more. They were completely polarized--the more he spent, the more anxious and thrifty she became. They would get into huge fights about it. I worked with them on accepting their differing attitudes about money. They realized that even though it's a struggle, it doesn't have to damage their bond. My advice: Find a middle ground that leaves you both content with the solution."

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